IT's NEAR!

U know what???

CHRISTMAS IS REALLY AROUND DA CORNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Woo HOo!!!!!!!!!! Now I'm getting excited! Heaps of practices happening in church as the day draws near! Starting from last night. We had worship practice till 11pm! Gosh, that's super late man... and and... after practising for the presentation on Christmas day, my head felt light! Why? Coz I had to sing parts along with another friend! And her pitch is so high and I had to follow... lack of oxygen man.... blurzzzzzzzz

Sunday is going to be crazy! Service where I'm serving, followed by worship practice and meetings and FINAL REHEARSAL!

Haha... I can feel the adrenaline rush already, but hopefully I have the strength to last through all the activities line up!

Hey, feel free to come to my church for a visit. You can click on www.firstassembly.org.my for da map!

btw,

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nearing Christmas

Anyone excited about Christmas!?!! I guess that I am. But Christmas also means loads of things happening in church as well. This year, on a smaller scale, my church is having a Nuwav Christmas Celebration. For RM20 for 2 persons, you'll get to have a full dinner followed by dance, drama and countdown for Christmas on 24th December 2007.

A lot of us have put in heaps of effort in it and I pray that everything will run smoothly during that period as well.

In conjunction with this year's theme in church, all 3 congregations took the opportunity to visit the orphanages around and many are blessed by these visits. It is really an eye opener, to know and to see how blessed we are. Yet, it prompts a desire in the youth to want to reach out and share their happiness with the orphans as well.

God has truly bless First AOG this year, with heaps of collaborations amongst the 3 congregations. I really do hope that God will continue to bring unity to our church and that the church will grow into a deeper level of intimacy with HIM too!

Check out the Christmas celebration ya! And contact me if you want to come! Btw, that night would be a bilingual night (english and cantonese)!

December, the time of the month where people spend and spend and spend. Promotional ads on sales are pushed to the max, proclaiming to the market that they should buy this and that for their loved ones. People are getting excited and busy, thinking and planning on what to buy, thinking and dreaming of what they would get on Christmas. For the malls, decorations are already up; a mere manner in attracting more crowds to their malls in hopes of more returns. Not only that, churches are busy planning and organizing events, running programs after programs to get people to go to their church and to share this joyous occasion.

I guess in a world where busyness is the emphasis, many lost their “time” to slow down and to enjoy what Christmas has to bring. What is Christmas? It is the time where we are blessed abundantly, where God sent His son on earth to be a blessing to all of us. In the midst of us buying gifts for others, we ought to pause for a moment to savour the blessing that has been poured out to us by heaven. And with that in our heart, we ought to allow that thought to carry through as we purchase gifts to bless others.

The recent trip to an orphanage with my church has opened my eyes to how blessed I am to have parents who care deeply for me, who bear with me through my “bad” and who continue to love me unconditionally. I’m blessed to have parents, relatives and friends who loves me for who I am, for who I was and for who I am aiming to be in life. To see these young people, who, in their lacking of love, grow to be mature, firm and positive, makes me see how different I am as well as my church youth as compared to them. To see the courage in their eyes, to see the fire and desire in their heart to grow and to live this life no matter what comes their way, makes me think about my life, my growth as well as my desire to see the youth in my church to grow deeper in their lives as well.

All these have led to the idea that December is also a month of reflection. It is the time where we reflect how has our year passed, whether there’s any changes they we see in ourselves, how much we have grown through the many months. In the midst of all the busyness around us, there is a need to slow down and to ponder. It is from there that we plan for the next year, the expectations on ourselves, the resolutions that we want to set and etc. Even as we slow down, we ought to savour and learn to be thankful for all that’s in our lives. Be thankful for the family that you have, be thankful for all the material things in your life, and even be thankful for all the hardship and bad things that has happened in your life, for I believe it is through such incidences that you grow to be stronger and mature. Hardship shapes our personality and character even more so than happy times! So count your blessings in life.

James 1:2-4

2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

It’s a bit early, but…

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

Questions, questions, questions..

Questions, questions, questions.. that's what I've been facing these days. It's not a good sight seeing all these happen. For whatever reason it is, I'm just bored and tired of things I guess.

Whenever friends or colleagues ask me things, I try to tai chi it over to some place else. Why? I really don't know. Maybe I'm just being plain tired already of work and stuff, that I feel like pulling away and isolate myself.

Gotta work on getting my life on the right track again. A friend said that my focus is at lost and shifted to something else, and that makes me think too. I guess it did happen to me and now in order to get things right I gotta be sure of what I'm going to do.

speechless

in the midst of all things oh Lord,
I turn my eyes to You,
Seeking to see You rather what's around me.

You know my struggles,
You know what's going on in my heart,
You know the anger, the hurt,
You know the stubbornness, the grustration, the pain,
You know what's in my mind and what's my reaction to thing

Tiredness is the least of the word that can describe my state of mind
Exhaustion is like a wall to me, one that I'm unable to climb through right now
Work may be done for now, but the mere thought of more coming in brings about fear
In the midst of this struggle,
Who can I look to for comfort?
Who can I look to for understanding?
Only You oh Lord, only You.
You are the only one to whom I can rely on
You are the only one to whom I can share all that's happening without fear of any sort.

Lord, teach me to look fully at Your face
Show me Oh Lord, what is it for me right now
even a question such as this, I cannot ask properly
State of mind... what is it? I have no idea
But Oh Lord, to whom can I turn to if not You?
FOr You are great to begin with, Yet gentle and loving enough to care...
Thank You Oh LOrd, for Your great presence ...
Thank You Lord, even though ....
Thank You Lord...

busy busy

For the strangest reason, research is picking up again at this period! It's crazy. There is just so much things to do and handle that I feel like I'm hitting the wall soon. Quite tired ... I guess to the extend that I feel like holing up in some weird places where people can't find me! BUT, how can I do that when I'm handling so many things....

Was just talking to two friends last night as both ask me to be careful and not break down anytime soon. I do hope so, but it's something that I don't have an answer to. All in good hands I guess. All the more I gotta submit to God's precious arms.

Sigh... crazy work period again.. will it end?

Dear Lord, u know what's going on in my life right now and there isn't any words for me to describe much of it. Please Oh Lord, pray for u to pull me thru...

Amen

How are you?

This is one question that my colleague posted to me recently? Wondering how I'm coping since she read my blog, i was honest in sharing with her about some of my plans. I guess for the fact that we've always been honest with each other and she knows that I'm going through makes this talk easier.

Planning to move on, looking around and etc are some of the things that's happening in my life right now. Trying to figure out things and making sure things are alright for now. Hopefully things will run smoothly for me, at least till year end. Can't decide for sure what I should and ought to do. I guess all I can do now is to do my part and pray. Pray that God will lead me, pray that God will open the door for me and pray that God will sustain me, as He has always been doing.

Dreading

It came to a point where I dread work again. I dread the things that I need to do. I dread the communication that I need to make. I dread the things that I need to complete.

I guess it's high time for me to seek again? I've been doing that on and off, but never with a full intention. I myself do not know what is making me ponder about moving and etc. Maybe God wants me to say, maybe it's just me, getting used to the craziness and resigning myself to it (high probable it's not though). I still do not know why. Both my colleague and I are considering the move and are praying about it. Yet we sense a need to stay on for the moment. I've thought of giving myself six months (from September... meaning already 2 months have passed!) before moving on. I guess for now, I'll pull myself through till December... and then I'll reconsider my move. Hope I can tahan till then......

Independence

Was doing devo when I came across this passage written by Selwyn Hughes:

"Observing the ways in which those who are not yet Christians deal with their deep inbuilt longings has always interested me greatly. Some just deny them. They pretend they are not there and attempt to keep them out of awareness through the defense of denial. Why do people do this? Because to admit to these longings is to admit that they are dependent on someone else to provide what they cannot provide for themselves. As I have said many times before, that feeling of being dependent is something that the sinful human nature abhors. One of the roots of sin is the spirit of independence; people don't like to feel that they have to depend on God for their lives to work. They much prefer to depend on themselves and are therefore sinful. "

For the fact that lucifer chose to be independent of God and chose to be on his own ought to wake us up to the idea and the thought that independence ain't just what it seems right? And the fight for independence in terms of gender and etc ... are they just as that or is there some underlying factor/thing that's happening?

Which brings me to the lives of couples... they live to be dependent and yet in some ways, independent of each other. But the part, the thought on the amount of effort that the couple put in to learn to be dependent on each other is something that, I guess, not to be taken lightly.

Marriage is probably a manner in which God wants to open up our eyes to see, and to learn to be dependent on Him as well.

Thoughts, thoughts....and revelation....undeniably from God.

Sky

Been fascinated with the sky these days... snapped some ...

Good Article for people to argue about God

AN INTERESTING CONVERSATION

be it true or not, it is still a very interesting conversation....at least to me :)

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty. He asks one of his new students to stand and.....

Prof: So you believe in God?

Student: Absolutely, sir.

Prof: Is God good?

Student: Sure.

Prof: Is God all-powerful?

Student: Yes.

Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then?

(Student is silent.)

Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fellow. Is God good?

Student: Yes

Prof: Is Satan good?

Student: No.

Prof: Where does Satan come from?

Student: From...God...

Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?

Student: Yes.

Prof: So who created evil?

(Student does not answer.)

Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?

Student: Yes, sir.

Prof: So, who created them?

(Student has no answer.)

Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son...Have you ever seen God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?

Student: No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.

Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student: Yes.

Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.

Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Prof: Yes.

Student: And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof: Yes.

Student: No sir. There isn't.

(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)

Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?

Student: You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something.You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't. If it were , you would not be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?

Prof: So what is the point you are making, young man?

Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from monkeys?

Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)

Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?

(The class is in uproar.)

Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?

(The class breaks out into laughter.)

Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)

Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.

Student: That is it sir... The link between man & God is FAITH. That isall that keeps things moving & alive.

WANT TO KNOW WHO THAT STUDENT WAS?

The student was ...Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, the Ex President of India and this is a true story.

CAMP!

It went great! That's all I want to say. Though there were hiccups here and there, but the whole team made great effort to overcome it and make sure things are well done! I'm so grateful for a chance to work with everyone :)

Of the struggles and..

In the midst of my struggles, I cry out to you my lord... hear my cry oh Father... do not leave me alone, but rather, allow my eyes to feast on you as i cast my worries, my struggles and my burdens to you oh Lord.

The cry of my heart is loud, the burden of my heart is heavy, weighing down on me, making my steps smaller and harder to make as each day goes by. But Lord, as I turn to you, please do not let me go until i feast my eyes on you. Let not your light grow dim in my life, but rather, in the midst of what i'm facing, may your light glow ever stronger and brighter still....

I-Bridge Camp 2007

Have you just graduated and are looking for some directions? Or perhaps you've worked for a number of years, but yet find the transition from studying life to the working life still a challenge, a gap that leaves many things to be desired. Or maybe you've lost the luster that once was in your Christian walk, whereby the once close fellowship and passion for Christ has been replaced by an emptiness and meaningless pursuit of career.





If so, consider joining us at I-Bridge Camp 2007 this year, from October 13th to 16th, http://www.ibridge.com.my. Located in the scenic Cameron Highlands, the refreshing, fun and invigorating camp will definitely make an impact on your life. 4 days 3 nights or 3 days 2 nights (depending on your leave), we're all young, working graduates, just like you. Do hurry and sign up fast as the limited places are going fast!

Singapore, I ain't seeing you til next month

Supposed to be down in Singapore tomorrow onwards for training cum retreat. However, due to the chicken pox that my boss' son has, it has been postponed till later. Gosh, can't believe it actually, because Friday is my birthday (nay, not making big announcement here) and some of my friends in Singapore was planning to take me out for dinner, or something of that sort. But now, too bad. What's more, my Malaysian friends knows that I'm going to Singapore and there isn't anything planned. So I guess I would just stay at home for the night, since there isn't much for me to do anyhow.

Wanted to write more, but duno wat to write suddenly... oh well...

Times of Refreshing and Revival

Praise God for He is worthy of all praise! Only He and He alone are one true God, undeniable, indescribable, irreplaceable, almighty, great, wonderful, generous, loving, caring, peace maker and many many more! Praise God for He is worthy to be praised!

Having attended the revival meetings by Rev Timothy Yeung, I feel greatly blessed and made to understand better on how the Holy Spirit works and what worship really is.

I agree with what he say, worship is borne out of the fact that you hunger God. We are all created to worship, that's why no matter who and where, people do worship something or some gods in their lives. Maybe for atheist, who said they don't believe in anything but themselves, but allow me to be bold in my own opinion, that they do worship themselves by saying that... but this is purely my opinion and no one self. God created us to worship Him, but because of the fall of Adam and Eve, we have become separated from Him. But our nature of worshipping is still in existence.

One thing shared that strucks me strongly is that we are worshippers of God must hunger for more of Him! We are like parched lands, so dry that we're so cracked inside. In parched lands, nothing can grow, nothing at all. Only well-watered lands has plantations. We are like parched lands, and thus, there isn't anything growing in us. But if we hunger for more of Him, our loving Father will water us with more and more of the Holy Spirit, allowing us to drink more and more and more of Him to the extend that we no longer because a parched land but instead, a land that is well-watered and things will GROW!

One strong reminder that strucks me is this: those of us who are in praise and worship can always demand the best, be the best drummer, be the best guitarist, be the best worship leader and etc, but beware that it becomes a habit. He's not saying that we ought not to do our best for GOd, but we are to beware of the possibility that in our quest of pursuing to do our best, we forgot the main reason for our worship. God doesn't demand us to be perfect, but in all that we have, we are to do our best. Do the best with what you have. If you have the best equipment and you are playing the best music, but if you are not up there to worship God, then there isn't any difference between us and those concerts that's out there. Always remember what we are up there for. We are up there to lead the people into worshipping God. We are priests that leads people to draw closer to God. How? By proclaiming God's greatness. There isn't any ways or methods, but rather, acknowledge who God is and that in itself, will bring about your church to draw closer to God.

Christians out there, always remind yourself not to be a benchwarmer. But everytime you go to church, go with a heart of wanting more of God. DOn't just sit there, but go with a strong desire for more of God and to see God move. When christians get together, don't just chit chat and all, but use that as an opportunity to fellowship and to exalt God together.

GOd is great! Always always great.

Sometimes we never thought of this, but God took the FIRST STEP to draw closer to us. It is not us. He took the first step by sending His one and only son to the earth to be sacrificed on our behalf. Those who are parents, can you imagine sending your son to the gallows? I may not be able imagine the suffering that parents goes through, but the thought of it is incomprehensible to the point that it's unphantomable. But God did just that. He sent his son to die for us.... and what does he want from us? Only that we would want Him in our lives again.

Father Lord, I thank You for the time of refreshing and the chance to witness your great powers moving mightly amongst Your people. Lord, I believe revival is heating up in this nation, and Lord, I pray that I would have the chance to participate in it. May Your anointing continue to fall in this nation and may Your fire continue to light up more and more of Your people to come and draw closer to You. Thank You for Your amazing presence, thank You for Your amazing revelation and thank You for You!

Troubles after problems

Probably in a deep shit situation right now. A junior staff was directed with a nasty email and what I meant as help in my reply email... it was sent instead to the owner of the nasty email. My boss found out about it and he is not happy. I didn't realise until my boss called me, and being the cause of it, he said this is one thing i need to settle myself.

Oh well, called another supplier who got involved and ta, he is "selamba aje". Even told me not to worry and that he will talk to the owner of the nasty email.

My boss? I smsed him saying I've spoken to the nice supplier and he is alright with things. He replied asking me to be careful with the direction of my emails.

Like very simple hor? Monday still have to face the nasty email owner .... what can I do? Pray....

p/s: my life has been very dramatic ever since I worked here. Never knew I can:
-do so many things at one time
-resolve so many problems that arise i.e. how? i need a dvd player (boss)..(me) ok, I go home and get it now (group starts in less than 45 minutes).
-manage such crazy bunch of people in a go
-too many to list..

Tired, but looking towards the one who can give me rest

I'm tired... felt like I've aged a lot working here. One month of working seems to me as though it's one year of working. I'm drained, with no one to lean on at work.

Only He, and He alone can I look up and find peace.
Only Him, that I am able to turn to and pour my heart out

I'm tired Lord, and I turn to You for rest
I'm burdened, and I turned to You for your light burdens
I'm weary, and I turned to You for your ease

I may not understand what's going on, but LOrd, I will continue to trust in You at all times, and not try to comprehend things on my own. Lord, I acknowledge Your presence in my life and allow You to direct my path....

Work is quite draining at the moment. Feel like giving up, but still, only God knows the best timing for me to do so. Will hold on, not the work, but on God and on His promises for my life. Want to grow deeper in Him, for loving Him is also the greatest gift in my life.

Can I comprehend without Him in my life? I can't.... even before I accepted Him into my heart and life, He has already been working to draw me in. How wonderful our God is, that He knows us even before we are formed? Incomprehensible, for such an almightly God would choose a mere me to live in me....

Oh Holy Spirit, stir in me, that I may once again burn for Him... with a passion unspent.... in entirety, to serve Him from my humble being...

Faith

Once again, grateful and humbled by God's word. What is not only believing what we cannot see, but faith is acting on what you know full well is true.

Sometimes I guess, we always console ourselves, hey, we just need to believe in God, and that's faith. But in reality, faith is not only believing in God but it encompasses action too. What action, we are to act out what we know is truth. Everyone around us does believe in God, but for us believers, God is not just another God out there. We know He is the one and true God out there. Yet, many of us live our lives as though we are oblivious to it.

Walking with God aint easy. Life is never easy. Especially for believers, if you have the notion that life would be easy peasy and you don't have to work for it, then you better wake up. Life is never easy. But what it is, is the fact that we have Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour, our peacemaker, our counsellor in our lives, and we know we do not have to walk alone, and that is what makes us different from the rest. Work... didn't God created Adam to work? Work used to be a positive notion, but it became negative only after Adam fell and sinned. Us, the reconciled, the one known by Him, should see work as positive now, to work for Him.

I guess, all in all, we should be grateful for what we have. In the world that feeds discontentment, all the more we should turn our eyes to Him and be contented.

Father, thank you for the fact that whenever I ponder upon Your words and who You are in my life, that You would refresh my soul and mind once again. Though I am physically and mentally tired, You never fail to nourish my soul. A trickle of Your Holy Spirit gives me peace that I need, and I thank You. Thank You Father, for the chance to have FAITH in You.

In loving You forever, Amen.

Work is taking its toll

Would anyone want to hire me? Deemed the superwoman of the company... been working in this company for 8 months, out of which 5 I'm the only researcher in the company handling all the projects. Good decision maker and flexible and agile in all situation. Quick on her feet and quick to pick things up.

Ain't fun being deemed a superwoman in the company. The only researcher in the Malaysia officer, with another colleague who is the accounts manager, things can be quite crazy. I think I'm hitting the brink soon. With this weekend so packed with church and the need to rush work, I think I'm crashing soon.

Dear Father, I pray and pray for more of your strength each day, to help me through. I need life, and my life is in your hands. May you continue to always be the person to lead me at all times.... Father, I'm weak, totally... at the brink. Only you and you alone can sustain me,. hear my prayer Lord, for with my weary body I come before you, seeking for more of your presence...

Part 1 of Hong Kong trip

Been wanting to blog about my travel in Hong Kong, but have not been having the chance to do so. Right now I'm in the airport waiting for my flight departure.. and there's another story to tell... maybe in the later part of this posting.

Scheduled my flight so that I would be in Hong Kong from 15th till 19th August 2007. Reached here just in time for my meeting, thankfully I requested to check in a bit later (11pm). As usual, there is flight delay and I was rushing like crazy even from the morning itself. You see, I had to do a transit in Singapore to come to Hong Kong due to certain reasons, and I only managed to reach Singapore with less than half an hour (or was it 15 minutes) to catch my flight to Hong Kong. I practically had to run/dash to the gate! And all the while I was like.. WHY THE HECK IS IT SO FAR???? Breathlessly, I made it on time and got comfortable in the flight.

On flight, a grandmother was sitting next to me. She's Singaporean but she's a cantonese, so ended up chatting with. Such a dear old lady, helped her with things and all, and I'm cool about it. I'd like helping them, because they have gone through so much and have so much experience and life-story to share. She shared about her children, one of which was in the flight with us, sitting on the next row on our left with her two children. Think she's grateful that I'm lending a helping hand. Realised as I was talking to her, that parents do have amazing influence in our lives. She shared that because her parents suffered so much to raise them up, that she felt she does not have the right to actually enjoy herself. Indeed, I am grateful for all the love and enjoyment that my parents have given to me… grateful indeed. Likewise for my grandma, I would love for her to enjoy herself. Not everyone can live to be 90 eh? Well, she is one of the lucky ones then :)

After the flight ended, I was pretty stunned by some of the elderly people in the plane who pushed their way through to get off the plane. Went blur for a moment and I was like, ooookayyyy... but realised they were hurrying to catch the connecting flight, so it's cool. I myself had to rush like mad to be able to meet my client at 430pm at Causeway Bay. It was 330pm already and would definitely take me an hour from Hong Kong Airport! Tried calling my client of my impending lateness, but was unreachable. So I called the facility to alert them to welcome the client. With that, I'd managed to reach there like probably 5-10 minutes later. So work starts and I was working till almost 11pm. Exhausted, i took my time to get to my hostel.

I ended up sleeping at 4 something in the morning, after refreshing myself and did some work. Mainly chatted with a friend about nothing… haha.. but it was good to crap sometimes. Neways, woke up the next day at about 1050am, cause received a call from my boss enquiring on the group the night before. I think I’ve quite mastered my voice to sound awake although I just woke up… haha, too many experiences whereby my boss’ call woke me up in the morning. Anyhow, his call woke me up and I’ve gotten myself up and did some work in the morning. Showered at about 12 plus and went out for lunch. The minute I reached downstairs, I was stunned. Because it was raining quite heavily and I left my umbrella upstairs. Feeling lazy, I decided to brave the rain and went about to purchase some water and necessities for the trip. Once done, I went to eat some porridge at a nearby shop. It was really weird though, for their porridge’s very sweet. I couldn’t finish it and left it as that.

As it was still pouring I decided to back to the hostel and laze about. Feeling lazy… haha. Neways, ended reading a book that was lying around at the hostel. Quite interesting, I would say Sidney Sheldon is quite good for he really keeps you in suspense throughout the book. Interestingly, the story revolves around multiple personality disorder, and the story ended amazingly well. During the course of it, I was chatting with a friend, and because he was studying for his exam and me with my book, we missed each other’s messages quite a lot. We ended up being a parrot, with the numerous “hello, are you there?” on the msn. Haha…. By the way, it was still pouring outside, making it amazingly nice to stay in-house.

At 4 plus, I went to shower and prepared myself to go to Causeway Bay for work again. Today’s event ended quite well, it numerous good take-out from the group. However, like the day before, the group ended late again. The client was so amused that he turned and asks me if it’s normal. I told him that it does, because the respondents were the ones talking a whole heap of their feedback. I guess the interesting part about my work is the things that the people would say and share with us. It’s amazing the things that they would share, sometimes unpredictably un-assumptious.

Likewise, the group ended late again, at about 945pm. Supposed to have dinner with my friend, and because she was held up at work, and vice versa, she thought I had finished dinner (told her I would finish about 8plus) and thus she went home straight. As for me, I was still in the observation room and did not dare to sms since the client was sitting next to me. So after the whole thing ended, I rang her and she was giving some exclamations about me not contacting her earlier. Assured her it’s alright and told her to recommend what’s nice at the area. She told me to visit this place called Yee Shun Milk Company, which is a few shops away from Causeway Bay Plaza 1, towards Sogo. When I reached there, I realised that I’ve passed by this little old shop the last time round and had wanted to go in to try (but I didn’t though). So my friend recommended me the Pork Chop burger and “Dang Dan” (Steam white egg ….. or something like that). I’m impressed by the Dang Dan, because it was so smooth and soft. It literally slides in your mouth and the texture’s light and easy. Not only that, it was quite a big portion too, as least compared to those in Kuala Lumpur.

However, the burger was not really interesting, for it is just a plain baguette with a piece of pork chop in between. However, I would give it credit for the pork chop was not too, what’s that word… kenyil in Malay. Can’t think of the English word at the moment.

All in all, it is one of the cheapest meal I’ve taken in Hong K0ng, with a total cost of HKD37 (RM17.50).

Went home right after that…. And oh, did I mention it was still raining after the groups and after dinner?

But really do praise God for the weather because I shared with my Hong Kong friends about my need to work on 15th and 16th August and that I would not be able to go with them. And viola, weather does not permit it either.

Just a pause to share that I really do thank God for His blessings in my life. He blessed me with a bunch of friends who are willing to drop their things and take me around I am truly grateful for that.

That's all for now :)

Post removed

Decided to remove this post as it may be considered offensive to some.

Oh well, for whatever reason it may be, I can only pray that you will realise what you're doing and may God continue to touch your heart more and more each day.

Raining

It's raining outside now, wondering whether I should head home... feelings are a tricky thing, for with the downcast weather outside, my heart also feels downcast. Why so? It's a question that I wish I can answer myself. Suddenly I'm flooded with thoughts that makes me think deeper... what are they? I guess it's something that I wish only to keep to myself.

Life can be really funny I guess. In all manners, I never realise that things can happen the way they happened. Was it coincidence? But I'm reminded that there is a season and a reason for things that's happening and I guess... maybe it is not so much of a coincidence there. What we feel are coincidences are probably what God has planned for us, pre-destined maybe? Nah, something that I would not want to speculate on I guess.

Still thinking and pondering... still living in a world where things are going crazy around me and where people wonder what the heck are they doing what they are doing...

Lord Jesus Christ, may Your hands continue to be upon my life.. may You continue to lead me and guide me, showing me what You have in store for me. I'm learning to be patient and wait on You... and really, it ain't easy... but then again, life has never been easy... but with hope I believe I go through this...

Thank You for always...

FAoG Youth Activities: BEYOND LIMIT!

First Assembly NuWav Youth

proud to present

The 1st ever NUWAV MONTH 2007

Which features many exciting events.

Here's come another exiciting event of the NuWav Month

Specially formulated for YOU & YOUR FRIENDS.
___________________________________________________________

THIS SATURDAY 21/7/07

At The First Assembly of God Church

INDOOR FUN GAMES (10am~5pm)

Arm wrestling, Brainiest Youth, Singing, Scripture Memorizing,

Youth Idle, Chess, Sms shoot-out, Cash to win by spectators and lots more.

NIGHT SESSION (Sat 21/7/07, 7.00pm)

Youth concert, Awards presentation,

Final stage of arm wrestling / youth idle / sms shoot out and etc.

Theme colour
ORANGE

YOU'RE INVITED, BRING ALONG YOUR FRIENDS ! ! !

ALL ARE WELCOME !

SEE YOU THERE !

For more inquiries, please log on to

http://firstassembly.org.my/Beyondlimit

Anyone interesting in checking out the Youth Activities at FAoG? It's Youth Month this month and we're having exciting activities this coming weekend. We will be having Beyond Limit Youth Indoor Games on 21st July 07, whereby fames such as singing competition, sms shootout, youth idle, arm wrestling and many more would take place.

At night there will be a night concert, starting from 730pm. Awards from all the activities that has been running for two weeks will take place during that night. It will all be fun fun fun! Oh ya, it's all bilingual, or trilingual, depending ... keke... excited? Do come and join us, especially for the night concert!

Bad day to begin with

Today started off badly... wasn't in a good mood to begin with. Boss flew in from Singapore as we have a meeting with client today. So yea, my boss asked me questions which I answer mono-syllabic style. At 1020am, I walked towards my car, intending to wait for my boss at the office downstairs. Walked towards my car, saw my tyre.. it was flat. I guess I was feeling very flat, coz when I saw my car condition, lagi no mood.. but no mood to care. Called office, spoke to the admin, told her tyre punctured, my boss asked at the other side, so how? I said, call cab.. we're going times square.. and headed back to my office.

When in the office, my boss was like.. "what happened?"
I said, "tyre punctured".

While we're waiting for cab, again my boss asked, "so what we're waiting?"
I said, "cab."

While in the cab, he was asking me about some of the ongoing projects as well as potential ones, awaiting confirmation. Again, I only said what's needed. No mood to talk much to him.

Suddenly he asked, "has it been raining?"
I was like "huh?"
Again, "has it been raining? It's quite hot here."
I had to think for a while whether it was raining anot.. then I was like, "Got. Yday and Sunday also rained"
"Was it heavy?", he asked.
"Yea, very heavy, sunday afternoon"....

then it was quiet again...

After meeting, had lunch with my colleague who met us at the client site. Superbly hungry...
Then took a cab back to the office. Walked to the auto repair shop that's around the corner (THANK GOD for it) and waited for the guy to help me fix my tyre.

The repairman also super selamba, taking his own sweet time to get his tools. Probably stood there for like 10 minutes waiting for him. Lucky I'm in my no feel mood. Else I think siao liao...

Neways, got it fixed for like RM10. BUt need to send the flat tyre to another shop to check. Haven't told my dad though. Sian.

By the time I got into the office it was already 3pm. What a day... after settling some matters with other clients... I only managed to start doing my report at about 430/5pm. My day just started...

Work - crunch time

Yeap, it's that time of my work again, where things are extremely stressful and I'm cracking my brain to write a report. Seriously, I realise that if you have to stress yourself so much just for an hour's report, then I guess there must be something wrong. Guess I'm not blessed with an analytical brain that would allow my thoughts to flow easily.

Am seriously considering of changing job... anyone can recommend anything? Aih, gotta keep praying and seeking God in this I guess...

Father, please remove the spirit of complaining in me and rather, to turn to You in all aspects Lord. I know it's tough, but I do thank You for the opportunity to work here and to learn what I'm good at. Please Lord, continue to direct my future and my path...

Worship with Abandon

Lord, thank you for your reminder... to worship with an abandonce.. to Not to care about what other people thinks about my singing, but remember and know the fact that I'm singing only for you and you alone.

Life is weird, when things are least expected, and when you think you remember... God actually comes and tell you, hey.. remember this? Got a reminder about what worship is all about as I read the article on ChristianityToday.com. GOd works misteriously eh... well.. am reminded, and will keep reminding myself once again ...

Saturday and I'm thinking about work

How boring can my life be? It's Saturday morning and I'm thinking about work already! ARGHHH... ain't good ain't good. Sigh, and early in the morning my boss sms me asking the status of one of the project. Still contemplating of replying him.. haha.. sigh... I dread this. I don't like to write report. Am I cut out for this job? Again, a time of questioning for myself. If I'm not cut out for this, what should I be looking for?

Sigh, another day of sitting in front of the computer and do up my report I guess. Am slowly having a better grasp of what I need to write, I think.... well... I'll just do it and see how things turn out. Can I finish it by Tuesday? Am not sure, but will try to at least finish 10 slides today. That's a rather achievable aim :P Well, doing up 10 slides ain't as easy as it seems. Never thought it would be so tough! Proven tough as I was helping my boss with his presentation and also in the last report that I did too. 68 slides on telling the client the end result of the study. Phew... can't believe it myself! Haha... sigh!!! This report should end up being about that many slides too... tensionnyaaaaaaa...

OKOKOKOKOK..... no more talking about work eh. Should just kick my ass and get things working! Till now!

Relationship

Realised that it aint easy when it comes to relationship... so many things come into play. More so if the other party is far away in another country. How do you handle it? Are all distance relationship doomed? Would there be an exception? I do hope in this case that it would be. If both are willing to work things out, who knows? Only God would know. All the more so that we must involve God in the picture.

We can only do so much, but realising the fact that loving someone is actually an action rather than just a feeling makes a big difference too. People fall in and out of love easily, but it takes work and commitment to love someone. The world view love as a feeling, but I figure, it's just not as simple as that right? Makes you wonder about the times back in the past where arranged marriage takes place. Love was not in the picture when they got together, but both parties work to make things work for them and in turn I guess, work towards loving their spouses too.

I'm sure there are incidences where you think that you don't like that person. But as you get to know that person, as you spend time to know that person, as you learn about that person, you figure, hey, he or she ain't that bad either. Maybe I should not be so negative in the first place. Maybe certain couples are also similar in that aspect, starting of as just normal friends, but realised as you know that person that hey, maybe things may work between us too? Who knows? Only God knows I guess....

Never say that things are not possible, I believe all things are possible with God. So instead of just saying, I'm in love or I'm not in love anymore.. maybe we can work things out by saying, I will love...

May God continue to bless you and keep you, and may He continue to watch over the growth of your relationship. I am praying for the both of you and I do hope that things will work out for you two.

Blog change

OKay, just being the fickle-minded female species right now.. keke.. i know i've been changing blogs wayyy too often.. let's hope this template stays longer eh... tho might tweak it again here and there... shall see

Sicko day

Been sick since last Thursday. Started off with a sore throat. Went to see doctor on Thursday itself as I'm trying to avoid it being full blown since I have to make a trip to Singapore during the weekend for a friend's wedding (will update on that later). So when I came back, things were still fine. But I guess the lack of sleep and the freezing cold in church on Sunday afternoon itself caused me to get worse.

So Monday, went to work as usual... face flushed and all.. colleague saw me and asked, "are u ok? Ur face is so red... why don't u go home and rest?" I did after spending half a day at work going to the loo and drinking water. Doesn't help that the office is under renovation... super dusty n smells of paint! Went home and rested. Thought a night's rest would be enough, but have some premonition about it though, coz my body was aching as I got on the bed. Next day came, I couldn't get up at all! Went back to sleep till 10 plus. Woke up and went to see the doctor. Apparently body ache was due to my body fighting those nasty bugs in my body! So yeaps, MC for the day and was told to rest. Came home, ate some light lunch and took medicine. Very effective medicine I would say, coz I totally knockout after that. Slept till 5pm. That means whole afternoon was gone.

Today, still nursing myself. Did not go to work with the same reason, sick, but am working from home. Productive?? Not very sure as well, so see how things go then... still have a report to write, another brief to prepare and another questionnaire to set. All in due time I guess....

Good Bargain

Ok, those who follow this blog would know that I don't always blog about my shopping experience. I am still a girl and thus! Here's my shopping experience to share.

Due to a wedding on 7-7-07, I went on a shopping hunt for the dinner. Lo and behold, I went to Niichi that is having a huge bargain sale. Granted, the quality ain't exceptional good, but hey, girls don't always need to buy expensive clothes to wear since we are always on the hunt for for.. ahem, clothes and shoes and etc.. keke...

I got two long khakis pants for an insane price of RM15 each. Mind you, these khakis looks good, to the point where you can wear it to work. What more can you say???

Also, I bought 2 dresses (I know, I rarely wear them... but if there's occasion for it I definitely will wear) for less than RM100. These dresses are knee length dress in which you can wear for weddings or any formal functions. With my current obsession for green.. again, one of the dresses are green in colour with a low v neck design. In its simplicity, it looks lovely, just the way I like my clothes to be =) This is what I'll be wearing for the wedding this coming weekend.

I went a bit crazy too, and bought a very abstract designed top, consisting of yellow and brown. Those who knows me and seen me would noticed that my clothing are always simple and single colored. Haha... But hey, it's okay to be a bit crazy too! Wore it for church last Sunday and received a lot of comments.. "wah, you look so bright n different"... hahaa.. Nah, not hooking for compliments. Thought it's fun to be different sometimes :)

Interesting Read... who says God isn't real? Well, He is to me!

On a Saturday night several weeks ago, this pastor was working late, and decided to call his wife before he left for home. It was about 10:00 PM, but his wife didn't answer the phone.

The pastor let the phone ring many times... He thought it was odd that she didn't answer, but decided to wrap up a few things and try again in a few minutes. When he tried again she answered right away. He asked her why she hadn't answered before, and she said that it hadn't rung at their house. They brushed it off as a fluke and went on their merry ways.

The following Monday, the pastor received a call at the church office, which was the phone that he'd used that Saturday night. The man that he spoke with wanted to know why he'd called on Saturday night.

The pastor couldn't figure out what the man was talking about. Then the man said, "It rang and rang, but I didn't answer." The pastor remembered the mishap and apologized for disturbing him, explaining that he'd intended to call his wife.

The man said, "That's, OK. Let me tell you my story.

You see, I was planning to commit suicide on Saturday night, but before I did, I prayed, 'God if you're there, and you don't want me to do this, give me a sign now.' At that point my phone started to ring. I looked at the caller ID, and it said, 'Almighty God'. I was afraid to answer!"

The reason why it showed on the man's caller ID that the call came from "Almighty God" is because the church that the pastor attends is called Almighty God Tabernacle!!

If you believe that God answers prayers then pass this on. God bless!

Friday = Holiday

Man, I'm so looking forward to Friday! I'll be again going down to Singapore. But this time it's for a joyous occasion... my friend, Wileen would be getting married this coming Saturday and we're invited. It would be sort of like a reunion as well for those of us from Monash Gippy.

She is like the second person I know from Monash Gippy who is getting married. Granted, they are a couple of years older than me, but we're all still in our twenties! Gosh.... haha, nah, my wedding bells ain't ringing yet... but it does magnify the fact that I'm getting older.... But I do thank God that I'm not as sensitive to my age as my peers. Some of my friends do ask me if I'm worried as we are getting older, and this year, being the quarter of the century year for me... I coolly n smilingly say no. Why? Because for me, age is just a number. It's weird, I'm always a logical person, and I guess my reasoning is that age is just a number. It's really how you live your life that counts, rather that the number of years you've lived this life. Again, granted the years are passing on by us very quickly... it's already mid-year right now... but I guess that's all the reason more that we should make the best out of it. Carpe diem! Seize the day.... I don't always do that, but I'm learning to... hence the need to step back and re-evaluate how my life have been. I wana do a retreat soon, but need to see how to go about it.

Hoping that my boss would allow me a long trip so that I can take a step back from all the hassle of work and ease into God's presence thoroughly.. but it's a long short neways... more likely with the huge workload that I have to work doubly harder than right now. Seriously need to reconsider! Haha... but I guess one can see it as a time of testing for me, to see where my commitment is with God.

There is a nagging feeling that I might move on to something that's really unexpected in the near future, but that's uncertain right now.. still need to pray about and bring it up to surface slowly. Scared, but yea... need to really pray about it!

haha.. okok.. my postings are getting boring again with the updates on WORK! Gotta stop man.

More to come... hopefully not work k!

Couples

Was updated recently by my friend that she just got attached... am very thankful to God for this guy that God brought into her life. And really, this is one relationship that is led by God himself. God, in His timing revealed to the both of them that they are right for each other and I can see that God really, really assured her by granting her the desires of her heart. Not only did the guy fight for her (not literally, but he shows he's honourable and is gutsy enough to work hard to go after her although she tried to dissuade him - that's another story altogether), but he is patient and understanding too. I like the fact that God opens up the door of communication between both of them, allowing them to talk through many things and all.

Such assurance that God granted her, assuring her of her beauty, and that there are people who are attracted to her and is willing to fight for her. I'm very very glad for what God has done in her life. One thing that amazes me is that in every step of the way, she reveals herself to be a good testimony.... she prayed over everything and anything in any relation to her life. Even over this guy, she prayed and commit the whole event to the Lord. And even after getting attached, she seeks me up to pray for the two of them. It's not like I'm good at prayer or anything, but as her accountability partner that's part of what I do too =) And the guy is understandable, because he knows I'm her confidant and is honour me for my role in her life.

Assurance I guess is needed in her life and I can see he is one that can and will continue to assure and honour her. Am very glad....

I do pray that God will continue to lead them and guide them in their walk with Him.. Praise God for the wonders He's done =)

Sanctuary

Why that title?

It's because I'm listening to the song by City Harvest Church. Simple but carries powerful lyrics... such a prayerful song.... if you want to listen to it, do drop me a msg and we can arrange for something.

Father, this song is one song dedicated to u.. a heartfelt prayer that still... touches my heart everytime I listen to it. Especially the part where the song says that you chose to LIVE IN US when the world can't even withhold your glory. What an amazing relevation and reminder... that you, in all your glory, in all your greatness... u chose me, a mere humble person and live in me... amazed... in awe....reverence....

SANCTUARY

CITY HARVEST CHURCH Key: C Worship

|| C | Am7 | Em7 | F/G | C | Am7 | Em7 | F Fm ||

C F WHEN MY WORLD WAS IN DARKNESS

YOU SPOKE YOUR WORD

NIGHT TURNED IN TO

Am7 DAY

YOUR BEAUTY FILLED THIS

F PLACE

C F WHEN MY WORLD STOOD IN SILENCE

YOU FILLED MY HEART

WITH SONGS THAT NEVER

Am7 END

FOREVER I WILL

F PRAISE

C/E

TO	Dm7 THINK THAT THE UNIVERSE

COULD

C/E NOT WITHHOLD YOUR GLORY

YOU

Am7 CHOOSE TO

A/G LIVE IN

D/F# ME

I'M SO A

C/G MAZED

G

(AND)

C I WORSHIP

Am7 YOU LORD

MY

F LIFE IN YOU RE

G STORED

HERE IS

G/F MY

Em7 HEART

MAKE IT YOUR

Am7 SANCTUARY

FOR	Dm7 NOBODY ELSE

BUT

G JESUS ONLY

C (YOU)

F YOU ARE FAITHFUL AND

C/E TRUE

GLORIOUS

F LORD

IT IS

G YOU I

Dm7 ADORE

YOU'VE TOUCHED MY

C/E SOUL

COMPLETED MY

A# WORLD I SURRENDER TO

G YOU

Sanctuary

Went to church's family prayer meeting today. I think it's my first after all these years. Never a fan of going to church during weekdays unless there's something on. But God is great. Again, never did I step in to the church's office if I don't have anything to do. Today, I went in on my own, tot of dropping my notebook bag in my youth pastor's room and go for dinner. He wasn't around though, and instead, I saw Pastor Irene...she is a pastor from Australia who pastored my church last year for 6 months. There is stirring in the whole family's heart to move over and take charge of the english congregation, but I guess the timing wasn't right, for God did not allow the move up to date. So yea, still seeking the Lord for the move. Meanwhile, they fly in and out to minister to our church... such faithful servants of God.

Haven't talked to Pastor Irene for a while, and I realised she knows the happenings in my life i.e. the busy work schedule and the flying in and out of the country... whole package I supposed... she was asking how I was and all... and I've shared with her my burden and what I'm going through. Shared with her the fact that I need to re-evaluate my life right now ... it was really a fruitful discussion and she can see where my heart lies and all.. after the sharing we commited my situation to the Lord and I feel very blessed.. because I know God is listening to me and knows what I'm facing and all.

I had a great time worshipping the Lord during the worship session... well, a bit of a problem with the fact that we had to sing in cantonese, mandaring n english in different songs.. but it was good. I love to worship!! hehe... but God is truly good today, for the assurance that He gave me and for the words of comfort that He showered upon me. Am very blessed....

I believe in time, things will be clearer to me, as to what I am to do and all in regards to my work. Serving is what I would love to do the most, but only He knows which is the best job for us eh....

Will continue to pray and commit it to the Lord... Be still and acknowledge that He is God....

A recap of life

Doing a recap here on my working life as a Consumer Insight Planner... wondering about certain things.

I've been here for almost six months after quitting ME. Basically as a market researcher, you do a lot of things and know a lot of things along the way. Things that may not be in the market right now, you know it, you've analysed it and you even played a part in further enhancing it. I've learnt:

1. that interviews are not as easy as it seems. Some people can talk, but they are also empty cans, if you know what I mean.

2. handling group discussion is even worse! It means there is this big group of people of which probably 1 or 2 are empty cans, yet they can sway the crowds! I'm not looking forward to doing groups... but I have a feeling it will be very soon.

3. It is not easy when you deal with an emotional supplier. Worse still if he blames you for HIS mistakes and divert all these negative emotions to you.

4. handling a project, be it in a group or on your own is never an easy task. So many things to check and to look into, I've yet to master it, but from a huge mistake, I guess I've learnt.

5. dealing with internal colleague as a senior is not easy. You cannot be too friendly nor too rigid. Too many a times I'm being ill-treated by colleague, and kinda peeved at it. Though she/he is older than me, but that does not mean I cannot give out tasks for them to do, yet it's overlooked and when I ask them to do task, they replied saying "wah, sounds like you're giving command". Not only that, they are just blatantly not helpful. Things are going crazy in the office, yet, their attitude is I don't care... sigh... still learning on how to deal with them right now.

6. working in a small firm is tougher than in a bigger firm. Here, you handle everything, from stage 1 to stage 10, with less assistance. It's awfully tiring when this happens, because it's NOT easy doing things on your own. Knowing myself, this is really forcing me to learn to do things on my own rather than in a group. Maybe God is doing something here, but who knows.

7. An eccentric boss really means an eccentric working environment.

8. to be flexible and adaptable. I guess this comes with the sms from an eccentric boss who just drop things on your lap and even tell you to fly within the week to certain destination.

9. that I'm quite a workaholic. Is it because of the working environment. I'm not sure, but I do know that I've been working a lot since Leong left. It's much worse because I'm the only researcher in the Malaysia office and I have to handle everything. More work to do because there are still a lot that I do not know and it's tough trying to handle everything from A to Z.

10. that though I do like what I'm doing right now, I'm quite drained by it. Am feeling the pull in the sense... church needs to be put off because I'm not around. Can't totally commit to serving in fear that the boss would want me to go/fly somewhere. Can't go to prayer meeting at all because it's on a weekday and I'm usually working late in the office as I'm rushing projects.

Am I cut out for this job? I know that if I want to succeed in this field, I can. But am I willing to give up church and free time just to reach to the top? Sometimes people say, hey, you don't go church doesn't mean that you are not close to God. Church is just a building... etc... yes, I agree with that. But there is also a need for us to fellowship and all. And because I don't attend cell group, Sunday service is my time in fellowship with my brothers and sisters in Christ in church. Also, having to serve in both worship and youth ministry, how am I going to do that if I'm not physically present? Not only that, there is this innate need for me to be in church borne not out of myself but, I believe, from God.

I guess I really need to retreat and seek God for an answer to this. Again, I am willing to give up my job because I never believe that we live to work... well, except for God :) But this working is borne out of my free will and not enforce.

The world forces us to conform to it, but I don't want to. Some people may say, hey, you're changing job again! It's really bad for your resume. Well, that is true... but I hope that people would understand that there are reasons for my changes and I'm not job hopping for fun or giving up when things become tougher. Certain changes are required as we grow older. If I were to slave myself to work now, who's to say what my life would be later on. Working hard now may entail me to a good life in this world, but ... there's more to life than having a good life later on. My life is from God, and I don't think He demands any less from me from what I want to give Him. Why? Because my love for Him is greater than wanting to live a life of relaxation and happy-go lucky. I'm definitely not perfect, I have my flaws and I am still learning to walk in Christ. But borne out of me is this desire to do what He wants me to do. I'm sure a lot of us do, I'm not saying that those out there don't. This is me and my personal desire...

My job is not my life and I never want it to be. But as this job is forcing my life to conform, I need to set aside and step back to see the overall picture.

My brothers and sisters in Christ, I pray that you will keep me in prayer as I seek God in this. It is never easy to share with people the need to change job because some may not understand and offer very realistic advice and opinions. But I guess the opinion that I seek is only God's and I will continue to learn to turn to Him in this.

BZ as a BEE

Remembered the last time I was talking to a friend, whereby I told him, I'll only be tied up till mid-May. What an understatement! I'm still busy as a bee, rushing here and there, having a few projects at hand, and learning to juggle them.

This job really requires me to fly here and there... and although it is a blessing to travel, I do find it tiring.

Was in Singapore for some internal meetings end of May, and then again, at Singapore for the Emerge conference. A personal trip nonetheless, a good one, though still tiring and exhausting. God has been good, a time of refreshment in His presence. Open my eyes to see some things for myself. Some times that may not be visible to the church nowadays. Hopefully, things would be better... but that's a different story altogether.

I'm preparing to fly to Hong Kong this coming Sunday for another project. Thankfully, there isn't much that I need to do except to listen and write a report. But meeting clients and agency on my own for the first time. A little nervous perhaps... also need to portray myself to be mature, young professional. But be those that know her stuff and know what she's doing. Do I fit those criteria? I seriously have no idea, but will keep on praying.

Upside of this Hong Kong trip is that I'll be able to meet up with my Hong Kong friends whom I met in uni. I see this as GOd's blessing, for everywhere I've travelled up to date, I will be able to find existing friends there. I might not be able to meet some of them, but the mere thoughts that they are not far is a comfort to me.

Been working here for 6 months now, and things are going on a up-hill at the moment. How am I taking all these things in? I seriously have no idea. There are times where I'm so overwhelmed by so many things that I just felt that I can't take it. But at times, things are so slow that I feel so relaxed and all. Are things fine and dandy for me?

Not sure is the answer. I do like what I'm doing, but not all of it. I like the operational side of things, but not so much on the research side of things. This job opens my eyes to the different skills that I have. I'm not to say that I'm that bad in research, but it's just that....I don't know?? Shall seek God in this and see what His plans is for the future.

That aside, was chatting with a friend yesterday when he ask me about things re God. He asked, if God were to ask you to quit your job and serve Him full time, would you? Prior to this, was sharing with him about seeking God and see what God has to say about what to do next. My answer is this, the answer is yes. It may be a struggle in the beginning, but yea, I would do it.

Why I say it's a struggle? To move from working in a corporate world with a steady income to working for God and all... the struggle is the adaptation to things around me. But one thing I see is the advantage is that I would learn to depend on God more too. My friend, again ask me, if God wants you to go to Africa, would you go? I told him that if that's God's plan for me, for my life, I am sure He will provide for me and all. He would definitely not give me anything or put me in circumstances that I cannot handle. It again, may be a struggle in the beginning, but GOd is with us.

My friend shared that he might not have the strength to do that. God does not demand us to use our own strength to do things for Him. But rather, God seeks one who has a willing heart. Look at David, a small boy, one that people will not choose. But God chose him because of his willingness, because of his heart for God. Look at Moses, one who can't really speak well, stutters when he speaks, an old man... but God chose him to bring the Israelites out of Eygpt.

I'm not saying that I am a saint or that I would not struggle if God calls me to serve Him. Maybe I would, in the sense that I'm worried about finances, I'm worried about my parents and how they would accept that fact, for they've worked hard to put me through university and I turn around and say I wana serve God full time. Them being non-christian might not be able to understand or accept it. But I believe that if that's what's God's plan is for my life, we just need to hold on to Him and trust Him on it.

I pray and hope that those who are reading this... don't think you're a weak person or that you are just not capable of doing what God calls or asks you to do. God will not demand from us something that we are totally not capable of. It may just be that you have yet to discover this capability of yours :) Have faith and continue to trust that God will bring you through whatever He has planned for you.

May God bless you abundantly my friends.