Went for another job interview yesterday. The job's a killer man. It's like I would end up working everyday of the week and also till late nights. Though I might be able to meet a lot of people and learn, I find that I cannot torture myself to the extent of only involving in my work and nothing else. I have no idea how other people does it but I cannot. For one thing, I want to reserve weekends, both for rest and also for church. What's more, I have to reserve Friday nights too as I might have practice whenever I am needed in church. I salute those who are so hardworking and strong mentally and physically, those who are able to fully commit themselves in their job.



Sad thing is my parents are so worried about me not being able to get a job that they are willing me to try anything there is. I guess maybe I do have expectation, for I do not want to get myself involved in certain things. However, I trust that I can and will be able to get a job that is suitable to me, hence I will be patient and not rush into anything.



It's so sad to know that a few of my friends are going through some very tough times. My heart aches for them. I don't know how to comfort them, but I will them not to do something stupid. MY friend told me this last night, "Aih, even if I die, it won't affect you, you might not be able to hear the news too as it might not reach you. Even if you do hear, all you say is what a waste, for this is how you feel if someone our age commits suicide." That is the saddest thing that I've ever heard a friend says to me. Reason being what he said is not true. Though I might not have been a good friend, for not always keeping contact with him, he has always been a true friend to me, one of those whom I can talk to and communicate well. He always has a lot to share with me, of his life, of everything. IF something were to happen to him, I will be devastated. It's hard to explain how my emotions runs when he was saying that to me. I was totally sadden by his statement, so much so cried at that very moment. I don't know how to let him know that it will greatly affect my life, to the extent that my heart will break. How can I show him that for me, suicide is not a waste in his case, but rather, a devastation to my heart and my very soul. At this moment, I can only pray that God will intervene, to help him see that things will be better in time. I wish so much that he too can grab hold of God's promise that better things will come his way. How I wish that he wil reach towards God and seek Him. I don't want to see him go down to the other road, to turn his back from everything. My friends ask me this, "why can't I be selfish and step away from everything" Why can't I be selfish when even the gods are selfish, taking away all my things?" I so want him to know that there is one God who ain't selfish at all, such a generous God that He willed His Son to die on our behalf. Yet, I don't want to come on so strong to the extent that I push him away. Please, friends and brothers and sisters, do pray for this friend of mine, that his soul may find relieve, and that God will reach out for him.



Father, I can only pray for this friend and for his soul. Please Lord, save him from his devastation, for his sadness. Reach out and touch him, reach out and heal his broken heart, his broken soul FAther. Oh Holy Spirit, speak of the Father's words into his heart and let him see the world in your eyes. Lord Jesus, save this child with your blood please.... save him...