If I ain't got You



Really nice song from Alicia Keys. Actually I heard it in the radio quite often, but never paid attention to it. That is until I heard Juwita sang it during GT's Free concert. At first I was thinking, hey, this song seems familiar, and as she sang it, it hit me! It's the song by Alicia Keys. Wow.. it's amazing that God can really do a lot of things through a lot of things. I am amazed that it carries Christian values, it shows me that hey, If I don't have God nor Jesus, I have nothing.

It sings that people are materialistic, a lot of us look to the things we can buy, we can have, we can see to make ourselves better. We buy cars, houses, even small stuff like watches, bracelets, earrings and all.. these are materialistic things. Even though we have a lot, yet we want more. The more we earn, the more we still want to earn. We can never be content with what we have. But what do we have in the end discontentment would be the word for it. We will never be content.

Like what she sings, having the whole world means nothing if we don't have Him. I would agree. Even till now, I still feel emptiness at times, for I know that I won't feel content nor full, so to say, until I have Him in me fully and wholly.



Do you ever feel like something's missing? Like there is a hole in your life? And then you try to ignore it by doing something to occupy yourself and to make that feeling go away? Have you ever, from no where, thought about what's going? Why am I doing the things that I am doing? Ain't there more to life?



Sometimes I wonder, why do people around us work and work and work and not have life at all? Some find me too playful, some find me too serious, and some find me weird. Sometimes I am hurt by those people and what they say, but sometimes it occurs to me that, hey, must I listen to what they say? Must I justify myself for the way I am. Yes, I have changed, I am no longer the Sue Anne that people know. I am different. Some can feel the difference and they don't like it. Some tried to restrain me by asking me not to be the way that I am. But why must I change to suit myself. So what if I am playful, silly, serious and weird? I will now say that I am not a typical girl. I am not just like any other girls, nor am I like any person. I am unique for God created me to be so. Why must I justify myself to you? Does it matter to you if I am serious when I need to? Can't I just be silly and playful when time permits it? I don't want to view the world with its complexity and suffer from it. I would look at it the way I want it to be, for God created this world and no matter how much we worry about our future and all, all we have to do is to trust Him and I believe that, even though some things won't run the way we want it, He still have control over it.



I know that they are still some bad traits in me, something that I want to let go but am finding it hard. Doesn't everyone have it. The bible says that no one is righteous at all, so why judge others? The plank's still attached to your eyes, yet you still want to point out the dust at other people's eyes? One of the very first verse that I remember from the bible is Matthew 7:1 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged". Yet in this world, no matter where you are, you'll be judged. Why must the world be full of judgement? Don't you know that God holds the power of judgement? I won't say that I never judge others. Sometimes I still do, but yet at times when I do, I come to realise that I shouldn't, for I myself am not perfect. There's flaws in everything, for none is perfect.

Recently I met with a brother in Christ, whom I sort of known for ages. It hits him that I am no longer the kid that he used to know, that I have reached the age of 22 and is an adult (though I might not act like one at times *wink*). What he told me was kinda offhand for me. He was telling me that now that I've finished studying, I should be getting a boyfriend and in a year or two, get married? To hear it from your relative is one thing, but to hear it from someone who is a few years older than you makes me think that there's something wrong. OKay, no doubt I would want to get married and to have a family of my own and all, but why must I go find a boyfriend? I know I'm of age and all, but can't I just stay the way I am for now? Why must I be in a rush to get a boyfriend? I know he meant well, not that I am offended, but I find that life is pretty much dictated in a way. So, does this mean that everyone must follow this circle, study, work a bit, then get married? No one mention at once, go serve the Lord. Hey, go pursue something in your life, but hey, go get married, go have children. Sigh... is that all there is to life? Will I be content with that kind of life? I don't really think so. Yes, no doubt all of us want a partner in life, but to me, I don't want one until I am certain I am ready.

There must be more to life. More than just working, more than just having a boyfriend or a girlfriend, more than just having a family and all. I wish we can forever do what we did when we were in gippy. To care for each other, and to praise God the way we did during the time before the Gift concert and like the last day of Shine.

Oh well, enough of ramblings from my part. I do hope that everyone will remember always that there's more to life. IF you forget, listen to the song "More to Life" by Stacie Orrico. And for all my brothers and sisters in Christ, remember the song If I ain't got You. Sing it to God man...