I believe that God is speaking to me right now. Well, not now, as in now now, but at this season in life. It seems like I've entered into a new season in life, whereby it's all about organising and getting my life into place; from all aspects.
For those who do know me, this is a huge thing for me. I'm not the neatest person in the world; and though I may seem quite level headed, I can be quite impulsive in the things I do too. Through and through, I do know that organising is one of my weakest element in my life right now. Doesn't seem to surprise you huh that it seems that God wants me to tackle this part of my life right now.
In order to get things started, I decided to blog about the process, the things to deal with, the things that I seem to need to organise along the way. What I did was, I started reading blogs that talks about "organising"; be it your life, your time, your work and etc. This is something that I picked up along the way unknowningly. Now, thinking back, I guess it's God's way of telling me, hey girl, well now, you better get the hint that I'm gonna do some overhauling in your life soon!! Haha, funny eh, You truly can still amaze me through and through.
Having been talking to my pastor recently; she shared about doing time management and etc; topics related to organising and it hits me that hey, it seems that this is the topic for me right now. Talk about being hit right on your head @.@
Like I said, I'm in the midst of getting myself on track. Bear with me as I go through this part of my life. Hey, feel free to drop comments on my blog too; and be my motivator in keeping me in check in this new season of my life eh!
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
Choose Where You Will Stand
Was doing my devo this morning when I read this entry. It really does put things into perspective. Sometimes, all we can say is... you know how things are, you can't really change it, so why not go with the flow? Well, this entry tells us that although we can't change something, but we can still choose to stand firm on something, something we believe in... hope this is a blessing to you as it is to me
Tracie Miles
"Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong." 1 Corinthians 16:13 (NIV)
Several years ago, I began playing tennis and became a member of a competitive team. Each week the team attends a practice clinic with our tennis professional to learn new techniques and strategies. He is always full of great tips and advice to help us improve our game, but one particular week he said something that really stuck in my mind.
He discussed the importance of court position; where we stand on the court could determine whether or not we keep the ball in play and if we win the point. Then he said that although we could not control what was going on in the court, we could always control where we stand.
I thought about how that statement is applicable not only to tennis, but to life. You see, even though we can't control what happens in the world, we can always control where we stand on issues of righteousness and integrity. Where we choose to stand will be evidence of the role that we are allowing God to play in our lives.
For example, we have no power over the sex, drugs, language and violence on TV, but we can choose whether we watch it or not. We have no power over the content of the movies coming out in the theatres, or how lenient the ratings are, but we can choose what we allow ourselves or our children to see. We can stand for purity.
We have no power to control the beliefs and actions of other people. We cannot control the downfall of morals in our society. We cannot control the decisions that Congress makes, which new laws are put into place, escalating gas prices, politics in the workplace, questionable practices in corporations, liberal tolerance, foreign affairs, war, or the state of the economy.
In fact, sometimes it may seem that we have no control over certain situations in our own lives, much less the things happening in the world. But there is good news - we always have the choice to choose where we will stand in the game of life.
Proverbs 20:5 says, "Knowing what is right is like deep water in the heart; a wise person draws from the well within" (The Message). That is really where court position begins - in the heart. If our faith is strong and grounded, then we will be able to pull from that wisdom when faced with opportunities to choose where to stand, knowing that the power of God within us will empower us to make good decisions.
Our only hope in fighting this battle of good versus evil, in our hearts and in this broken world, is to be prepared to stand tall and firm for Christ, despite what the opposition may bring.
You know, life is a lot like a tennis court. We each have our side. We try to stay on the right side, but sometimes the balls that get thrown at us pull us in the wrong direction. Other times they are difficult to defend, cause us to stumble, or throw us off track. But if we choose the right court position to begin with, that is, to stay on God's side and choose Him as our partner, we are much more likely to exercise the power we have within us. Drawing deep from the well of God's wisdom in our hearts, we can do the right thing.
There are times when standing up for our faith may cause us to lose the popularity contest, but it will allow others to see God in us. And, there may even be times when our court position speaks louder than words ever could.
Where will you stand today?
Dear Lord, help me have the strength and faith to stand up for what is right when I am faced with opposition, and not be swayed by the pressures in a fallen world. Help me live a life that glorifies You, instead of just taking the easy road and going along with the crowd. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Tracie Miles
"Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong." 1 Corinthians 16:13 (NIV)
Several years ago, I began playing tennis and became a member of a competitive team. Each week the team attends a practice clinic with our tennis professional to learn new techniques and strategies. He is always full of great tips and advice to help us improve our game, but one particular week he said something that really stuck in my mind.
He discussed the importance of court position; where we stand on the court could determine whether or not we keep the ball in play and if we win the point. Then he said that although we could not control what was going on in the court, we could always control where we stand.
I thought about how that statement is applicable not only to tennis, but to life. You see, even though we can't control what happens in the world, we can always control where we stand on issues of righteousness and integrity. Where we choose to stand will be evidence of the role that we are allowing God to play in our lives.
For example, we have no power over the sex, drugs, language and violence on TV, but we can choose whether we watch it or not. We have no power over the content of the movies coming out in the theatres, or how lenient the ratings are, but we can choose what we allow ourselves or our children to see. We can stand for purity.
We have no power to control the beliefs and actions of other people. We cannot control the downfall of morals in our society. We cannot control the decisions that Congress makes, which new laws are put into place, escalating gas prices, politics in the workplace, questionable practices in corporations, liberal tolerance, foreign affairs, war, or the state of the economy.
In fact, sometimes it may seem that we have no control over certain situations in our own lives, much less the things happening in the world. But there is good news - we always have the choice to choose where we will stand in the game of life.
Proverbs 20:5 says, "Knowing what is right is like deep water in the heart; a wise person draws from the well within" (The Message). That is really where court position begins - in the heart. If our faith is strong and grounded, then we will be able to pull from that wisdom when faced with opportunities to choose where to stand, knowing that the power of God within us will empower us to make good decisions.
Our only hope in fighting this battle of good versus evil, in our hearts and in this broken world, is to be prepared to stand tall and firm for Christ, despite what the opposition may bring.
You know, life is a lot like a tennis court. We each have our side. We try to stay on the right side, but sometimes the balls that get thrown at us pull us in the wrong direction. Other times they are difficult to defend, cause us to stumble, or throw us off track. But if we choose the right court position to begin with, that is, to stay on God's side and choose Him as our partner, we are much more likely to exercise the power we have within us. Drawing deep from the well of God's wisdom in our hearts, we can do the right thing.
There are times when standing up for our faith may cause us to lose the popularity contest, but it will allow others to see God in us. And, there may even be times when our court position speaks louder than words ever could.
Where will you stand today?
Dear Lord, help me have the strength and faith to stand up for what is right when I am faced with opposition, and not be swayed by the pressures in a fallen world. Help me live a life that glorifies You, instead of just taking the easy road and going along with the crowd. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Grandma's Here
Today mark the first day that Grandma is staying with us. Since her stroke, she seldom come over, as she is now crippled on her right side. Some of the things I note of my grandma, is how considerate she is of us. Although she is tired from the long hours of not sleeping the whole day, she refused to go to bed. We thought that it was because she wanted to watch tv, but noticing that she was yawning, I prodded her. In her lack of vocabulary since the stroke crippled her, she pointed to her wheelchair and said that she will sleep there. Further prodding reveals that she refused to go to bed because she does not know that we brought her bed along with her and thought that it was a new bed. She don't want to dirty it, thus she restrained herself from sleeping. I wonder if that's the case since this morning, as my aunt said she was awake the whole day. It's heart wrenching for me to see her like this, yet I am so amazed by the strength, the care and the consideration of my grandma.
Whilst I went in to check on her, I saw that she was still wide awake. My dad says that it's probably cause she is missing my uncle, aunt and my cousins. It's really sad to note that your son who has been taking care of you is now leaving to go overseas. I'm sure she misses them dearly, for my uncle is a very jovial yet mischievous guy, always disturbing my grandma and making her laugh. It's because of his "naughtiness" that has helped my grandma to improve on her speech. I'm really going to miss them. It'll be different when reunion dinners or family gatherings is without one family.
It's the start of taking care of my grandma. She is old, at the ripe age of 93 now. Although she may not have many years on to live, but I do thank God for the opportunity to care for her. It's because of her that I am the way that I am right now. She brought us all up single handedly whilst our parents (my cousin's as well) were out working hard for us. I still remember that when I was a kid, I had to run after my grandma, chasing her to go to the market. Imagine, a grandma who could walk so fast that even a kid have to run after her. That's who my grandma is. She showed so much love and care to her grandchildren, faithfully caring for us and watching over us. I will not ever forget those Saturdays whereby she will walk me to my taekwondo classes faithfully in the afternoon. Mind you, we were a big bunch of family, with all the uncles and aunties and their kids living under the same roof. Yet, she took the time to care for each of us. She will always hold a special place in our hearts.
Dear Lord, I pray that U will continue to watch over my grandma. I love her dearly, and I know U do as well. And I know that U could feel the pain of this family as well, seeing her the way that she is. We truly love her as much as she has loved us. Although sometimes it hurts that she could not remember who we are, but truly, we are thankful that she is alive still and is still blessing us with her presence. Oh Lord, open my heart and eyes to the lessons that U want me to learn from caring my grandma as a family. Bless her oh Lord, as U have always blessed me. In Jesus' name I pray, amen.
Whilst I went in to check on her, I saw that she was still wide awake. My dad says that it's probably cause she is missing my uncle, aunt and my cousins. It's really sad to note that your son who has been taking care of you is now leaving to go overseas. I'm sure she misses them dearly, for my uncle is a very jovial yet mischievous guy, always disturbing my grandma and making her laugh. It's because of his "naughtiness" that has helped my grandma to improve on her speech. I'm really going to miss them. It'll be different when reunion dinners or family gatherings is without one family.
It's the start of taking care of my grandma. She is old, at the ripe age of 93 now. Although she may not have many years on to live, but I do thank God for the opportunity to care for her. It's because of her that I am the way that I am right now. She brought us all up single handedly whilst our parents (my cousin's as well) were out working hard for us. I still remember that when I was a kid, I had to run after my grandma, chasing her to go to the market. Imagine, a grandma who could walk so fast that even a kid have to run after her. That's who my grandma is. She showed so much love and care to her grandchildren, faithfully caring for us and watching over us. I will not ever forget those Saturdays whereby she will walk me to my taekwondo classes faithfully in the afternoon. Mind you, we were a big bunch of family, with all the uncles and aunties and their kids living under the same roof. Yet, she took the time to care for each of us. She will always hold a special place in our hearts.
Dear Lord, I pray that U will continue to watch over my grandma. I love her dearly, and I know U do as well. And I know that U could feel the pain of this family as well, seeing her the way that she is. We truly love her as much as she has loved us. Although sometimes it hurts that she could not remember who we are, but truly, we are thankful that she is alive still and is still blessing us with her presence. Oh Lord, open my heart and eyes to the lessons that U want me to learn from caring my grandma as a family. Bless her oh Lord, as U have always blessed me. In Jesus' name I pray, amen.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Realisation
I realised that:
- life is complicated, because we complicate it ourselves
- we faces expectation from others, because we have expection of others as well
- love is beautiful, yet many times perversed by men (women) (think point 1)
- that greed breeds discontentment. Think of marketeers helping greedy companies to grow; they do up advertisements to breed wants and needs that leads to discontentment with our lives
- when one complains, one never realise that the complain will only breeds anger and bitterness in oneself
- it's better to shut up to gossips and complaints because it just will hurt rather than love; be it ourselves or towards others
- love is love; you can't say that you love yet you cannot love as a whole
- the ability to love is a blessing to others
- the ability to give and bless others is a gift in itself
- grace is borned out of love
- grace is everywhere, it's just a matter of opening your eyes and seeing it
- when life hands you a rotten apple, you can plant it, let it decompose and be a blessing to other plants
Saturday, April 3, 2010
God is Our Protector
I don't actually know what they are singing, yet I'm amazed by the power of God that moves even through this song. Are you blessed? I could feel my spirit stirring when I listen to this song.
Psalm 84
1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O LORD Almighty!
O LORD Almighty!
2 My soul yearns, even faints,
for the courts of the LORD;
my heart and my flesh cry out
for the living God.
for the courts of the LORD;
my heart and my flesh cry out
for the living God.
3 Even the sparrow has found a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may have her young—
a place near your altar,
O LORD Almighty, my King and my God.
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may have her young—
a place near your altar,
O LORD Almighty, my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house;
they are ever praising you.
Selah
they are ever praising you.
Selah
5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
6 As they pass through the Valley of Baca,
they make it a place of springs;
the autumn rains also cover it with pools. [b]
they make it a place of springs;
the autumn rains also cover it with pools. [b]
7 They go from strength to strength,
till each appears before God in Zion.
till each appears before God in Zion.
8 Hear my prayer, O LORD God Almighty;
listen to me, O God of Jacob.
Selah
listen to me, O God of Jacob.
Selah
9 Look upon our shield, [c] O God;
look with favor on your anointed one.
look with favor on your anointed one.
10 Better is one day in your courts
than a thousand elsewhere;
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of the wicked.
than a thousand elsewhere;
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of the wicked.
11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless.
the LORD bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless.
12 O LORD Almighty,
blessed is the man who trusts in you.
May you be blessed by this song as much as I did.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Never Cease to Surprise Me
God really never cease to surprise me and I am utterly amazed by His surprises. To think that He is all knowing, to know all things that happened in life and to be able to use His servants to verbally articulate pinpoint and articulate all that's within me, I really, truly am touched. Well, I won't say that things are settled and down with. There are a lot more things in which I need to go through and to examine in my life in order to gain that emotional healthy spirituality that I need in my life in my walk with Him. But what I do know is that He has open up the path for me and all I need to do now is to really, seek Him, learn to share with Him, learn to examine myself with Him and to allow Him to work through me. I want to break that Wall that's stopping me from going further. In order for me to do so, I will need to examine myself inwardly so that I will be able to grow outwardly.
Lord, thank U for opening the path for me. I pray Lord that I will follow through this opening in which U have allow me to step into, and I pray that I will be able to gain that freedom U would want me to gain. Thank U Lord Jesus, for Ur constant reminder that I am not going through life alone, that U are always with me, that U will never leave me nor forsake me. Even though there are times in which I feel alone, I feel lonely, I feel isolated, I know U are there with me. It may be that things are so chaotic in and around me that I cannot hear that quiet whisper of Urs. Teach me oh Lord to learn to enjoy the solitude and silence in life, so that my ears will be attune to Ur quiet whisper. Lord, U are wonderful, and I cannot stop praising U for being such a great God to me. U are just, so, so amazing oh Lord, just so so wonderful, so focused in Ur love for me and for those around me. Lord, break my pride I pray, and do not allow my ego to edge u out of my life. Rather, teach me humility, so that in my weaknesses, in my vulnerabilities, and in the every emptiness of me, that U will shine through me. May Ur face continue to be reflected and shine through me oh Lord. More of U and less of me oh Lord. In Jesus' name I pray, AMEN
Lord, thank U for opening the path for me. I pray Lord that I will follow through this opening in which U have allow me to step into, and I pray that I will be able to gain that freedom U would want me to gain. Thank U Lord Jesus, for Ur constant reminder that I am not going through life alone, that U are always with me, that U will never leave me nor forsake me. Even though there are times in which I feel alone, I feel lonely, I feel isolated, I know U are there with me. It may be that things are so chaotic in and around me that I cannot hear that quiet whisper of Urs. Teach me oh Lord to learn to enjoy the solitude and silence in life, so that my ears will be attune to Ur quiet whisper. Lord, U are wonderful, and I cannot stop praising U for being such a great God to me. U are just, so, so amazing oh Lord, just so so wonderful, so focused in Ur love for me and for those around me. Lord, break my pride I pray, and do not allow my ego to edge u out of my life. Rather, teach me humility, so that in my weaknesses, in my vulnerabilities, and in the every emptiness of me, that U will shine through me. May Ur face continue to be reflected and shine through me oh Lord. More of U and less of me oh Lord. In Jesus' name I pray, AMEN
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Sometimes, during the dark hours of night, there will come a point in time where my heart is moved. There is an intricate desire for me to write. About what, that is something that I wonder too. Yet, the innate need and desire does not dissipate even though I do not know what to write. It seems that the minute I sit down in front of my computer, or in front of my journal, words flow and sentences take place.
I don't like to admit it, but this moment, the moment right now, is one of those moments. I have no idea what's going to come out of this, but what I do know is that God is stirring me to write and to release all that's within me into words. I'm not seeking for approval of men, but the desire is strong and writing now is a form of therapy and a form of outreach of God to me, which I yearn.
What's there to write now? A sense of emptiness seems to be wanting to engulf me, to pull me deep into its recesses and not allow me to come back out again. Day in, day out, there is such a struggle inside of me that seems to want to drown me. At times, I am able to fight it and come back up to catch a single breathe. Other times, it seems to be such a driving force to push me deep down, rendering me unable to climb out of its pit of darkness. Oh, how true what Paul say in Romans 7:15... "I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it."
There's so many things that I know I ought to be doing and those that I ought not to be doing, but yet, I continue to do them or not do them. Emotions are good, but yet, sometimes, I allow all rational to kick me in what I need to do, and yet, these rationales, when unable to withhold my emotions, allowed the full force of my emotions to break free without reign. I'm scared Lord, of my uncontrollable emotions at times. I'm scared Lord, for my years ingrained rational in my life. I don't want either to take reign in my life Lord. Will You take that place in my life once again. Lord, I am thirsty. Will you allow me to sip from your foundation once again? Will you allow me to drink Your water, so that I may never thirst again? Will You allow me to drink from the water You offer to me, and allow this water to turn into a spring of water welling up to eternal life? Oh Lord, how my soul yearns for You. Yet, Lord, I continue at times in hardening myself again You. Oh Lord my God, forgive me oh Lord for the stubbornness in me, for the hardness of my heart. I pray Lord, that You will soften me once again. Lord, I seek solace in You for all the hardships in my life. I give glory and thanks to You for all the pleasures in my life. I thank You Lord for life, for You gave me a voracity to live a life so full, doing things that brings me pleasure. Teach me to continue to be ever thankful for all things in my life. I know I'm not always grateful, but Lord, Your grace, Your mercy, renewed everyday comes pouring even right now into me, and I want to thank You for that. Oh Lord, I pray for Your grace and mercy to continue to cover me, and may Your love oh Lord, continue to be my leading steps everyday of my life.
Although I may be very tired, drained, jaded, not wanting to feel, but Lord, soften my heart that You want prune out things that You do not want to take place in me, and plant those lil seeds that You will to take place in my heart. I trust You oh Lord, be my guidance oh Lord...
I don't like to admit it, but this moment, the moment right now, is one of those moments. I have no idea what's going to come out of this, but what I do know is that God is stirring me to write and to release all that's within me into words. I'm not seeking for approval of men, but the desire is strong and writing now is a form of therapy and a form of outreach of God to me, which I yearn.
What's there to write now? A sense of emptiness seems to be wanting to engulf me, to pull me deep into its recesses and not allow me to come back out again. Day in, day out, there is such a struggle inside of me that seems to want to drown me. At times, I am able to fight it and come back up to catch a single breathe. Other times, it seems to be such a driving force to push me deep down, rendering me unable to climb out of its pit of darkness. Oh, how true what Paul say in Romans 7:15... "I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it."
There's so many things that I know I ought to be doing and those that I ought not to be doing, but yet, I continue to do them or not do them. Emotions are good, but yet, sometimes, I allow all rational to kick me in what I need to do, and yet, these rationales, when unable to withhold my emotions, allowed the full force of my emotions to break free without reign. I'm scared Lord, of my uncontrollable emotions at times. I'm scared Lord, for my years ingrained rational in my life. I don't want either to take reign in my life Lord. Will You take that place in my life once again. Lord, I am thirsty. Will you allow me to sip from your foundation once again? Will you allow me to drink Your water, so that I may never thirst again? Will You allow me to drink from the water You offer to me, and allow this water to turn into a spring of water welling up to eternal life? Oh Lord, how my soul yearns for You. Yet, Lord, I continue at times in hardening myself again You. Oh Lord my God, forgive me oh Lord for the stubbornness in me, for the hardness of my heart. I pray Lord, that You will soften me once again. Lord, I seek solace in You for all the hardships in my life. I give glory and thanks to You for all the pleasures in my life. I thank You Lord for life, for You gave me a voracity to live a life so full, doing things that brings me pleasure. Teach me to continue to be ever thankful for all things in my life. I know I'm not always grateful, but Lord, Your grace, Your mercy, renewed everyday comes pouring even right now into me, and I want to thank You for that. Oh Lord, I pray for Your grace and mercy to continue to cover me, and may Your love oh Lord, continue to be my leading steps everyday of my life.
Although I may be very tired, drained, jaded, not wanting to feel, but Lord, soften my heart that You want prune out things that You do not want to take place in me, and plant those lil seeds that You will to take place in my heart. I trust You oh Lord, be my guidance oh Lord...
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